Pastoral perspectives on lived pain in maternal bereavement

Abstract

This study explored the lived experiences of maternal bereavement within the Anglican Church of Southern Africa, focusing on the Dioceses of Pretoria, Natal, and Eswatini. Using a hermeneutic phenomenological methodology, the research sought to uncover how bereaved mothers interpreted and lived through their grief, and how their experiences resonated with theological traditions and cultural frameworks. Data were gathered through in-depth interviews and written narratives and were analysed manually through iterative cycles of coding, use of the hermeneutic circle, and thematic reflection. Rigour was ensured through member-checking, reflexive journaling, and triangulation across diverse data sources. The findings revealed five central themes: the silence of the Church and pastoral neglect; the inadequacy of existing liturgical and ritual responses to maternal bereavement; the embodied and existential dimensions of grief, aligning with Heideggerian concepts of uncanniness, a disassembled world, and being-with; theological tensions involving faith, doubt, and divine providence; and the mediating role of cultural practices and community solidarity. Across the three dioceses, similarities emerged in mothers’ accounts of isolation and unmet pastoral needs, while contextual differences, such as geography, leadership styles, and local cultural practices which shaped bereavement experiences and coping strategies. Pastoral theological reflection highlighted the urgent need for the Church to re-imagine maternal bereavement care by extending support beyond the funeral, fostering communal and embodied practices of remembrance, and integrating Christological compassion with liturgical reform. The study concluded that maternal bereavement was both deeply disruptive and potentially transformative: a space where memory, lament, and resilience converged. A holistic pastoral response must therefore draw on interdisciplinary insights to accompany bereaved mothers with sensitivity, authenticity, and sustained care.